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Loving yourself – Dutema Life Institute

Loving yourself

Feelings- do they really matter? What is the role of feelings in decision-making?  I have found that as much as we need our logical mind and intellect to assess the options relevant to a decision, we must first engage our feelings.  Consider that feelings are actual sensations we feel in our bodies such as butterflies in the stomach or sweaty palms etc.  These feelings are messages coming from our inner guiding system, our intuition.  When we pay attention, we realize it is telling us something important.  Tuning into our feelings in this way helps us to make a well rounded decision that is suitable for our practical lives because we have considered it from every aspect that makes up our human practical lives.  

 

1-14-20

Here’s to a New Year of Fulfillment at every level of our individual and collective human experience!

Looking at the 2nd paragraph of the “Love Yourself” poem:

“When you know that you are doing your very best within the circumstance of your existence…..Applaud yourself!

Wow! How awesome it would be to live naturally in this state of self love and self appreciation and gratitude..?

It is so fitting that I am writing about this paragraph right now, for my mind was just doing it’s overwhelm/confused/slipping into its self pity game for what I had not yet accomplished today.  So, I ask myself, did I do my very best? maybe not, but did I do my very best within the circumstance of my existence? Then my answer is YES.  What is the difference? The difference has to do with finding that middle ground between setting and accomplishing goals AND accepting the reality of what limitations may have arisen that day or in the moment; knowing that all limitations are merely opportunities for growth or expansion or deepening of some sort.  In my case, I see today, that what actually happened was a re-organization of ideas that felt like a storm was moving through.  But in retrospect, things are much clearer now.  And so my learning and my applaud has to do with trusting that I am doing my very best in the present moment and not measuring rigidly and valuing myself to an egoic set standard 

 

 

 

How does one love oneself?  

I have been reflecting on the answer to this question as I coach my self and my clients.  On the homepage of my website, you will find the poem: Love Yourself….  

I would like to expand on the personal significance of each stanza of this most self nurturing poem.  

Starting with the first paragraph: “Wherever you are in this moment is exactly where you are supposed to be, no matter how things loo, seem or feel. For in a perfectly evolving Universe, could it be any other way?:

This seems easier to accept when things are going rather well for us.  But what about when our relationships are rocky
or health is not in such good shape or maybe your own inner state is just off,
or when we or someone we care about and love are going through what seems like
a never-ending rough patch? And so many other times when we might wonder- Why
am I here? Why is this happening to me and why yet again?! Or how could it be
that such a good person having such a hard time? Etc. etc.  

This is my understanding of how the statement in the poem can be helpful in developing
the art of self-love….

Life, I think, is an experience of a series of continuous cycles of
realities created consciously or unconsciously, on earth as well as in the
higher dimensions.  I don’t want to get
into that really here, for what matters is how we are to relate to life as it
manifests here on earth. 

In this moment of struggle or discomfort or confusion etc., I may call upon
the wisdom of this Universe that is precisely orchestrated.  What do I mean by that?  Well, look at the human mechanism, look at
the precision of nature, animals etc., What has made it so?  Some might say God, or the Creator etc.  What if it is that same Source that is at
work in your discomfort? And I’m not saying that God is bringing this trouble
to you-I am saying that there might be an Infinite Wisdom that is orchestrating
your troubles for one reason only.  And
that reason is for you to evolve in your consciousness.  This means to discover that which you get to
embrace, you get to dis-create, forgive, develop, let go of, accept and so on.
Given that you stand to benefit from whatever you are experiencing, could it be
that you are part of what is causing the discomfort as well?  Could it be that you are in partnership with
an Infinite Wisdom that “knows” a particular reason why what you are experiencing
is nothing more than an opportunity for you to discover a blessing behind it
all?  Often we can’t see it while we are
in it, but once it has passed, if we look, we can definitely see the goodness
that came from it.  What if we practice
trusting this truth which in itself allows us the clarity to see the very
blessing as we are experiencing the unwanted reality?

Is this love for one Self?  Isn’t it?  The ability to be in an uncomfortable situation
and yet be able to lovingly see the perfection of it all in that you are being
presented with an opportunity to better yourself, rather than buy into the
negative mind chatter about what is wrong with you, others and life in general,
which only depletes your precious life force energy and digs you deeper into
the hole of despair.  And yes, sometimes
we joke around about it, but we all know, that is merely on the surface, for
what lies beneath is fear.  I, having used
this approach for decades, would say, does not work for me at all.  I have found trusting in the wisdom of the Universe
and therefore in what lies within me to be a far more productive path towards
fulfillment and happiness.